Day 513 - What was so good about yesterday?

I'm sure some one might wonder if the experience at the free clinic caused so much angst, what could be good about your day to say it was good?

The goodness about the day was being there and realizing were I to end up working with such a group after completing my seminary work, I'd find my "occupation" again being fun. In other words, my rule has always been, if you wake up smiling and you are heading to do something fun whose other name is "a job," your life is OK. This is one of the reasons I am drawn to people who find it easy to smile (yes I am thinking of Max's mom).

Day 530 – On The Way Home

Some times the day just goes right, whatever “right” is. Sometimes it all turns about an insignificant thing. The day just jumps up and slaps you across the face. It is all one can say about it, the day went right.

Today was one of those days.

It was our Union service day. It is a day, something I admit with a little embarrassment, I really didn’t know existed even at a national level; a “day of service” to commemorate, or honor, or respect the people who lost their lives on September 11 in New York and Pennsylvania on that ill-fated morning. I heard on the radio that the Muslim world also has a one thousand day service period that ends today for the same reason.

All of us entering students at Union Theological Seminary (as well as a number of second, third year and doctoral students) met at Watt Chapel to situate ourselves in a “Day of Service.” I went with a group of my fellow students to a local “free clinic” not too far away.

I was taken aback by what I heard from the directors of the clinic. (Should I have, given my life in the inner city of Atlanta participating in the life of the congregation of Central Presbyterian Church?) This non-profit serves tens of thousands of clients in a year. It has a significant (numbering in the hundreds) clientele of HIV/AIDS cases they assist. I heard the Director of Medicine at a local university runs a large volunteer (free) practice at the clinic.

We didn’t spend but perhaps four hours there, hardly enough to make an impact except upon our own consciences. We divided into several groups. Some of the lucky of us went out and weeded the little grassy plots of ground (the clinic survives on volunteer donation so they can’t afford grounds keepers). Another group went down and sterilized hypodermic syringes in a valiant effort if not to stop drug use, to slow the spread of HIV/AIDS and other blood-born diseases such as hepatitis.

Yes, my first reaction was, “Are they suborning drug use?” Then I realized in a fit of rationality, they are in the trenches of the real world. They may slow or stop addiction via this, their counseling and case management outreach, but they can’t stop the immediacy of the present storm of real people walking in off the street strung out on the fangs of addiction, twisted and pulled by rationality to stop and compulsion for that next fix, real people who still have a glimmer of hope to avoid the slow death of AIDS/HIV.

So after they finished the sterilization, they sorted new age condoms, gels and various lubricants and other niceties related to the sexual reality of this world into “safe sex hand-out packs.” One of our party had to excuse themselves because of their discomfort. I have some empathy. It really was an acid feeling in my stomach. I thought especially as a child of the 1960’s, what depth of despair has our world sunk because of our rebellion? We are diminished as a people by this pathos.

My God, what hath we wrought upon ourselves?

We collected ourselves in the basement towards the end of our single half-day day mission and considered a few questions. One question was why do we serve others, these poor people who are literally the dregs of our society?

Many, if not all of us in one way or another, voiced an opinion that mimicked intentionally or not the discourse between Jesus and the lawyer of the Pharisees who asked, “Teacher, what is the great commandment of the Law?” Jesus answers, “You shall love the Lord, your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the greatest commandment. And a second is like it; you shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the prophets.” [Matt. 22:34-40]

It is true. All we can do is help anyone we can find the way home, knowing we ourselves will be welcomed at the door when we arrive.

Day 524 - Postmodernity in the 21st Century

I have been reading the twenty plus books to get a head start for next semester. One of the books on pastoral care delves deeply into “postmodernity” and another also reviews it as a legitimate social criticism(!).

Postmodernity is an ill-defined, politicized concept. Even its proponents and “critics” of the school have found it difficult to provide a measured, operating definition of the term. From my recollection it is a concept the evolved out of the 1960’s student movement, a movement I would characterize at a superficial level by its nihilism and alienation towards our parents’ values and at a deeper level as fear of failing to meet the standard of our parents’ generation.

The generation of these parents was a childhood lived in the Great Depression, an adulthood dealing with the threats to their world in World War II and then the Korean War. It was the generation who finally came home to a world of relative modern comfort living in a cold war under the threat of nuclear destruction.

Some of you may have read one of Joseph Heller’s less appreciated but important novels, Something Happened.¹ This novel captures the essence of the worldview of many of our parents. We are entirely too close to them to see that at least some of them were living in a post-traumatic stress syndrome in reaction to that whirlwind ride from the rural society of the early 1900’s, the unspeakable horror of World War II and the urban sprawl and world threats of their 1950’s and 1960’s society.

In the end, postmodernity may be as much a movement directed against American, and by extension, western values as anything else. While our culture has good reason for criticism, I am in a fair quest of a legitimate definition of postmodernity from its practitioners.

Edward Wimberly seeks to define postmodernity by defining “modernity” and essentially defining postmodernity as its opposite.² He states modernity is characterized by (1) a Cartesian philosophy; (2) capitalism; (3) technology; and (4) science.

He further states these four matters have caused a massive “redefinition” of the mind of the disadvantaged, which has led to a pervasive nihilism that explains the current problems with the predominately African-American population of the inner city. He further states, “[modernity is] a social, theological transformation brought about by technology uprooting beliefs and values." Personally, I do not think the problem can be so narrowly defined as strictly an African-American matter.

In effect, Dr. Wimberly is defining postmodernity as a social movement of Luddites.³ The Luddites were a anti-technology social movement in England in the early 1800’s opposed to automation of textile mills. Dr. Wimberly goes further. He extending the concept to be essentially complete opposition to all elements of western society, a culture that he characterizes as a wasteland peopled by individuals living isolated, unconnected and dismembered lives seeking validation via the cultural norm of possessions.

A favorite word for postmodern critics is “deconstruct.” It is used in the manner that existing "norms" have to be "deconstructed" so they can be "reconstructed," presumably in a more effective "postmodern" form.

Often the comments of the late pop critic Marshall McLuhan on the media and its pervasive influence are used to define the postmodern “view.” One famous widely known quote about television and the media is “the medium is the message.”⁴ (As do many people, I think a lot of what McLuhan said about the media was remarkable prescient. McLuhan maintained every way we communicate is "the medium." In fact, I have to admit a lot of my critical comments benefit from the reality described by McLuhan, “We look at the present through a rear view mirror. We march backwards into the future.”⁵

From all this, I conclude that the postmodernity of these postmodern critics is a nihilistic liberation philosophy upset over virtually every aspect of our modern culture. In my mind postmodernity finds this definition most visible in its view of the arts.

I interpret this in regard to the arts to mean that art is to be reduced to what is accessible to and meaningful to each individual, in essence, “ Every one is an artist.” The natural extension of this idea is that if everyone is an artist there is nothing that is not a work of art⁶, or certainly no place for artistic criticism. Marshall McLuhan put it a bit more humorously when he said, “art is anything you can get away with.”⁷

Another underlying element of postmodernity is the ideal to be “global village, or a culture of living among and with others.” In a sense, this is an idea espoused by the philosophy of Gabriel Marcel.⁸ Marcel strongly believed we exist only in-relationship to others. He defined this as true “being.” Marcel, however much he struggled with the dehumanizing element of technology, would probably roll over in his grave if he were called a postmodern thinker. His thinking was far more sophisticated.

As mentioned earlier, I maintain (and remember) that postmodernity arose out our 1960’s student days when outraged by the draft, Viet Nam, the materialism of our society and the mores placed on us by our parents concerning sex, religion and race, we rebelled against virtually every element of our parents lives, and often choked on the largess they fed to us.

Perhaps standing at the apogee of postmodernity is The S.C.U.M Manifesto⁹ by Valerie Solanas published in 1967. S.C.U.M. stands for Society for Cutting Up Men. Among the gems in this manifesto are two particular points she makes in its beginning:

1. “Life in this society being at best, an utter bore and no aspect of society being at all relevant to women, there remains to civic-minded, responsible, thrill-seeking females only to overthrow the government, eliminate the money system, institute complete automation and destroy the male sex.”

2. It is now technically feasible to reproduce without the aid of males (or, for that matter, females) and to produce only females. We must begin immediately to do so. Retaining the male has not even the dubious purpose of reproduction. The male is a biological accident: the Y (male) gene is an incomplete X (female) gene, that is, it has an incomplete set of chromosomes. In other words, the male is an incomplete female, a walking abortion, aborted at the gene stage. To be male is to be deficient, emotionally limited; maleness is a deficiency disease and males are emotional cripples.

Even though she truly believed this miasma (and I intentionally left out her really blunt language), hardly any of us can see this as other than hyperbole drive by an internal struggle with cultural norms. Who burnt their bras? Who was so happy about the technical advance of, and to get that first prescription for birth control pills as a sexually liberating act? Maybe using that technology opened eyes to the real issues of sexual politics imposed on many women.

The sad thing about all this is that even in my textbooks postmodernity is viewed as a legitimate philosophical and theological perspective. In spite of the seemingly romantic element of being a young socialist seeking to deconstruct society, I would suggest that at best the anomie or alienation many of us experienced in the 1960’s and 1970’s was rooted in fear of the draft and the realization that our culture was grossly materialistic and we are part of it, perhaps psychologically in a terrifying fear and guilt that we would fail to achieve the greatness of our parents, or justify their sacrifices, as it was anything else.

We should face the facts. Most of us had a self-interest in being anti-establishmentarians and had little true altruism about it. Forty years later our predicament proves it. Essentially, Richard Nixon ended the "postmodern" movement when he replaced the draft with the lottery. A lot of postmodern thinkers with large lottery numbers suddenly got interested in other things, like getting out of college and finding a job. (My number was 161, I got an induction notice and was never inducted, but that is another story.) Unfortunately in the philosophical and artistic world there is a lot of inertia and they fail to remember McLuhan's assessment that we can only see the present in the past as we motor on looking backwards.⁵

Very few of my hotheaded radical friends from the 60’sand 70’s are living in poverty and fighting culture, most of them drive BMW’s, are presidents of their family companies, or are retired in their summer homes watching their bank balance, the Dow Jones Industrial Average and their stockpile of scotch and fine wines. In a facile argument, postmodern apologists might explain this unseemly retreat circularly that these folks(themselves) are victims of culture, a culture that redefined their values.

There will always be people who for good and bad will become engineers or scientists, human resources people, secretaries and groundskeepers working for companies that seek to build better weapons for war at a fat salary. In fact many standing in the pulpit are part of that chorus. Many Christians find it easy to justify war as did the noted theologian, St. Augustine. ^10,11 but the chrous isn't one of unanimity. Sad as it is to admit, social and international struggle, and capitalism probably are a primary engine that drives technology; but that does not mean that motive has to be the true end of mankind.

I think perhaps "postmodern" folks like Dr. Wimberly miss (or conveniently ignore) the bigger picture. We have water purification technology that allows high purity water is almost any place on the globe, vaccines against hepatitis, pneumonia, whooping cough, measles, polio, some cancers and many more. We see HIV/AIDA vaccine on the near horizon - something desperately needed in the African world.

We may want to contemplate technology a little more critically. It provides artificial skin for burn victims, extracts tens of times more gasoline from a barrel of crude oil (yes we all need to stop driving so much), CAT scanners, MRI machines, industrial and mechanical engineering that has automated manufacturing to dramatically reduce the cost of goods, the burgeoning growth of standard of living conditions in China, India, Viet Nam, and Mexico that are leading to social revolution.

We may want to contemplate the growth of information technology that is allowing us to understand the code of the human gnome and may allow us in the near future to manipulate cell growth to cause a heart to heal itself from heart attack, or a liver to regenerate, or a body to start producing insulin again. Technology might well allow our children to live active, productive and healthy lives well towards the hypothesized natural lifespan of the human body of about 120 years.

Of course I should mention the media arts and ceramics, artistic disciplines that have benefited quite a bit from technology.

We may be surprised that the percentage of women enrolled in science and engineering at Georgia Institute of Technology is over 20% from 40 women in 1965. We may be surprised that Georgia Tech has an active program to recruit people in the arts and African Americans. At one time if not now, Georgia Tech led the nation in African-American enrollment. I expect these trends only to increase at every university. The doors are open.

* * *

Is this a technology tract I write? Am I wearing rose colored glasses? Hardly.

Will the technology be democratically dispersed, or will certain countries use it first? Almost certainly the latter will occur, but no one should doubt that the technology will diffuse rapidly. Then we will face a true theological crisis as our world rapidly fills up even faster with people draining resources.

Were we to allocate the amount of funds on clean water that we spent in Iraq over the last eight years there might well be no thirsty people, at least for water. That is our American sin.

Does anyone want to bet the innovations and threats to stabilty might well lead to the social and theological pressure that stimulates human exploration of enhanced agriculture, resource preservation, exo-earth migration and who knows what other kind of technical innovation? We may well be at the door step of the true “postmodern" era. It really depends on us.

The reality of technology is that we opened Pandora's Box a couple hundred years ago or more (think about Michelangelo). No one will pack technology away and turn back the clock. It is going to be used and unless we decide to jump in, understand and use it for our common good, we can count on it being used badly as often as well.

The reality of classical "postmodernity' is we outgrew it before it was ever more than an idea struggling for definition. It may well be a movement in search of a cause but it may also be the early voices of whatever future we are running backwards towards as fast as we can.

It is almost certainly true that we are entirely too close to the subject to know what the so-called postmodern world may look like. In my eyes, the current “postmodernity” is a burp in a social evolution driven by technological change wherein, theological and social elements must redefine the paradigm to maintain functional value both to their own belief and to guide an ever increasing technology-oriented culture.

The reality of a "reformed" theology would seem require determining how to apply its worldview to present time not just full of inventions and ethical choices inconceivable in its literal (3,000 year old) view,¹² but of insight and understanding into the nature of consciousness inconceivable in its literal application. Are we to believe the God that made a world wherein such technology can exist did not intend us to learn from it and apply it and change with it?

I owe an honest word in defense of Dr. Wimberly. I do not want you to leave this essay thinking I do not respect and value his ideas (or those important ideas of the newer "reformed" theology). Edward Wimberly is not in that literal camp. He asks some very important questions although his rhetoric works against him.

Any one who doubts the unhealthy preoccupation of our social structure with dehumanizing elements such as pornography, materialism, corporate malfeasance and the loss of the extended family isn’t really being internally honest. I think we fail to recognize the counter-cultural power of theology and of many people asking the right questions to enforce positive change; and we may not acknowledge the very real loss of hope for a positive future if we do not. In the end we shape the world through our human values as long as God continues this "experiment."

Dr. Wimberly is talking about real people in need who are "living on the edge." I suspect most people live along a continuum of internalized worldviews bounded by two edges or extremes. It is easy to define the extremes where few of us actually live. The majority of us live somewhere along the line between them, the hurting live near its extremes.

One extreme is the externally directed person who holds the idea that “I am powerless in the face of society. The world/culture around me, its values, theology and politics delimit me. I cannot succeed because someone else has he power to control me.” Perhaps Michael Jackson comes to mind, or a crack addict.

The other extreme is the internally directed person who holds the idea that “I am powerful.” Nelson Mandela comes to mind but his positivism is redeeming and clearly not seated at the extreme. The “I am powerful” mindset views the world as a plastic thing that “I may shape and mold so as to achieve my objectives. My achievements depend solely on my actions and commitment to them.” It holds onto an idea that there is something of value within us that we are obligated to share with the world. I still advise my sons "be sure you leave the world with more than you took from it." Just be careful not to take the idea too far.

Both extremes have serious theological and practical problems, which is why few of us could survive in the extremes. But from a pastoral care perspective not to understand and not to be able to look through the lens of someone living in those extremes calling for help delimits one’s effectiveness as a giver of pastoral care.

When one reads Dr. Wimberly’s book carefully one sees Dr. Wimberly has identified and discussed a very important and legitimate need, the victim-culture of many in the African American lower income groups. However, I point out that the alienation he addresses isn’t specifically racial. Many people are so alienated and live on the edge.

Bibliography

1. Heller, Joseph, Something Happened, Alfred A. Knopf, NY (1974)

2. Wimberly, Edward P., African American Pastoral Care and Counseling, The politics of Oppression and Empowerment, The Pilgrim Press, Cleveland, 2006. See for example pages 131ff.

3. Several good reviews of the Luddite movement are available, see, for example, Sale, Kirkpatrick. Reading, Addison-Wesley Pub. Co, (1996), or review the Wikipedia summary for other citations to begin an examination.

4. McLuhan, Marshall, Understanding Media: The Extensions of Man, MIT Press, Boston,1994 (a republication of the 1964 original)

5. McLuhhan, Marshal, http://thinkexist.com/quotation/the_past_went_that-a-way-when_faced_with_a/152841.html

6. Taylor, Mark. After God, The University of Chicago Press, Chicago (2007), Chapter 5, p. 216. Also refer to summaries of comments by artist Joseph Beuys.

7. McLuhan, Marshall, http://thinkexist.com/quotation/art_is_anything_you_can_get_away_with/215230.html

8. Gallagher, Kenneth, The Philosophy of Gabriel Marcel, Fordham University Press, New York (1962). See for example, chapter II.

9. Solanas, Valerie, SCUM Manifesto, AK Press, 1996. (Also available online at http://gos.sbc.edu/s/solanas.html.)

10. Benson, Richard, The Just War Theory: A Traditional Catholic Moral View, Tidings (2006).

11. For a good counter argument to the just war theory see, Brimlow, Robert W., What About Hitler, Brazos Press (2006)

12. A number of resources describe the so-called new "reformed theology" which its holders would call the "old" reformed theology. For a start one is referred to this web site: http://www.monergism.com/directory/link_category/Reformed-Theology/Essays/

Day 520 - The first thing one must admit is failure

I imagine some of you might be interested in how my seminary education is going. Now that Fall semester looms next week I guess it is time.

This summer was quite the challenge. I got situated in an apartment in late June and began summer language classes right after the 4th of July. Immediately (within two weeks) I came down with hoarseness from the skanky carpet and bad air in the apartment. That played well with my recitation of Hebrew.

Well, packing two semesters of Hebrew into seven weeks was quite a ride. The biggest challenge was learning the vocabulary, about 100 words per week. I managed an "A;" of course, having an exemplary professor helped. The coursework has led me to some very nice software that I hope will assist me in my Old Testament studies this coming academic year.

The language itself is interesting and fairly straightforward. The grammar and syntax is quite simple compared to English.

I find it quite interesting to read passages in the HB (Hebrew Bible) and compare the translation to say, NRSV, side-by-side. I already see a few places where in my opinion the “committee” (sounds too Presbyterian, doesn’t it?) took some rather extravagant liberty with the translation and I’m a novice, yet.

You may not be, but I was aware of the different organization of the "books"of the HB compared to Jerome's (?) version we use in the "Old Testament." A lot of HB "books" were moved around to make the HB read more like an advent of the NT.

I imagine V. Nabokov was correct. The first thing one must acknowledge upon undertaking a translation is failure.


Peace and Grace.
Henry

Day 504 - Disaster Preparedness

This is a summary of the events, actions and decisions made by PDA staff surrounding Fay, Gustav and Ike; they should illumine a path towards preparedness greatly improved over last year’s experience.

The critical part of the evacuation is the protocol for all personnel to move to Gulfport and proceed with evacuation to Meridian from there.

In late August 2008, two Atlantic tropical storms entered the Caribbean Sea sequentially, Fay and then Gustav. The timing of these storms shows how fast storms can arise, come upon us and the timing we have to react.

Fortunately there were no volunteers in the villages. The results are a lesson for developing a good disaster evacuation plan. Operation headquarters was in Gulfport, MS.

This document summarizes the relatively objective events covering Fay, Gustav and Ike, starting about one week before Gustav hit to several weeks afterwards. The next document will present an accounting of specific management and personnel failures that jeopardized safety and reflect the importance of clear chain of authority, routine preparation for disaster and importance of local relying on local leadership.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

On Wednesday August 20, the National Hurricane Center (http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/) was tracking TS Fay heading towards the Southeastern US from the South Atlantic. Tracking suggested it was going to be another Florida storm if it made the coast at all.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Fay wandered around Florida the rest of this week. Finally after dumping ten’s of inches of rain it started a slow amble westward. On Friday the predictions still were uncertain enough to cause concern but it looked like Fay would track well northward and plow across Florida and north Georgia into Tennessee.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

By Saturday, August 23, Fay had slowed to a 45 mph tropical storm and drifted a bit southward. It was almost a 100% certainty she would burn out over Alabama and Mississippi as a bad rainstorm. At this time, the NHC was showing Gustav as a tropical depression in the ocean behind Fay.

Nevertheless, the logistics staff had panicked and everything in sight was moved into sheltered areas or tied down.

Sunday, AUGUST 24, 2008

At this point the weather in Gulfport had picked up a steady gentle breeze and periodically high clouds that Fay spun off as it churned in the Panhandle and went totally north of the Gulf coast. There was some remote chance it would drift southward and give us a lot of rain. It passed overnight with little of no rain, and only substantial wind gusts.

Ominously, the satellite imagery showed the new storm, GUSTAV, might roll over into the Gulf, rather than go northward. The Gulf water is about 85°F and that is plenty hot enough of an engine to rev up a slow moving storm into a dangerous beast. [On August 15, 2009 the Gulf surface temperature is varying between 80-85°F and two tropical storms are approaching the southern Florida coast line.]

No decisions were made as to preparation at this time.

Monday, AUGUST 25, 2008

By Monday, the forward front of GUSTAV was battering Florida. Satellite imagery still suggested it might roll over into the Gulf into the warm 85°F water. At this time the probabilistic track issued by NHC moved over the southern edge of the Florida panhandle or slightly southward out into the Gulf.

Tuesday, AUGUST 26, 2008

The NHC predicted a "very dangerous hurricane" in the Gulf this morning:

"SOME WEAKENING IS SHOWN IN 24 HR DUE TO THE LAND INTERACTION WITH HAITI. THEREAFTER...THE HURRICANE IS FORECAST TO BE OVER EXTREMELY WARM WATERS WITH RELATIVELY LIGHT SHEAR. THE OFFICIAL INTENSITY FORECAST IS INCREASED AND NOW CALLS FOR GUSTAV TO BE A MAJOR HURRICANE IN THE NORTHWESTERN CARIBBEAN SEA. IT IS WORTH NOTING THAT BOTH THE GFDL/HWRF FORECAST SHOW AN EVEN STRONGER HURRICANE. MOST INDICATIONS ARE THAT GUSTAV WILL BE AN EXTREMELY DANGEROUS HURRICANE IN THE NORTHWESTERN CARIBBEAN SEA IN A FEW DAYS. “

The models suggested Gustav may eventually track west (the storm has slid south over the last 2 days) but for now the models are predicting a beeline for Louisiana and Texas.

Wednesday, AUGUST 27, 2008

Tuesday night Gustav slowed down as it crossed Haiti. The expected arrival into the northern Gulf on Sunday has moved to Monday morning. Its arrival may be my birthday present on Tuesday. Some models are suggesting it could be a stronger storm than Katrina but the National Hurricane Center says right now it is as probable it will be a category 1 to category 3 storm.

At this point we have less than one week until predicted impact and preparation for evacuation should be in high gear. No preparations for evacuation have started.

GUSTAV is now an ominous threat. It looks certain that it will become a full-blown hurricane in a day or so. It's killed 11 people in Haiti. All the tracks point towards the Gulf Coast somewhere in a 300-mile wide spread from New Orleans to Florida.

Probabilistic tracks point towards ground zero in Mississippi/Alabama, perhaps east of the current prediction. Currently, the weather map has the centroid aimed right at Pearlington. MS.

In a long-term recovery meeting in Hancock County Wednesday morning we learned the Governor's office may issue a mandatory evacuation announcement Saturday. A friend working in New Orleans for the state says the evacuation announcement may occur there about the same time.

After this meeting, the existing storm plan was implemented by the VVC. Between now and Saturday we will be packing up and securing property and moving it to designated storage locations. We are preparing roughly 48 hours before predicted landfall to drive our vehicles packed with food, water and extra fuel to Meridian, MS, the staging point. This requires a drive up I-59N, an evacuation route that is going run counter-current, all one-way North and will be funneling evacuees from LA and MS.

Thursday AUGUST 28, 2008

Thursday was a busy day. The National Hurricane Center still shows the centroid of models pointing at landfall somewhere along the northern Gulf Coast.

The conditions in the Gulf look favorable for a big storm, probably category 3, but on the NHC discussion they said a category 4 or 5 isn’t out of the question. By later in the day the storm track looks like landfall west of us, not good because the east side of the storm is where the surge is worst.

We are in the midst of preparation to secure villages and evacuate tomorrow (Friday) morning to Meridian (2 days before predicted landfall).

The objective is to secure Orange Grove, Pearlington, Lulling, Olive Tree and Houma.

Securing means taking all moveable materials, chairs, beds, records, computers, etc and placing them in the sea containers stationed at each camp or bringing them with us. Preferably we will move out trailers with the PDA trucks to prevent their destruction. Village computers should be take with us, they are the only record of activity and contain the only historical records. There are no options for remote backup in place.

Securing the villages in two days will require the logistics staff and local village managers to follow an orderly protocol to systematically secure each village. Time will be compressed due to the very late start of preparation for evacuation.

We have extra gasoline in containers stored under our protocol but we find most of it is old and stale. We do not have enough 5 gallon fuel containers to support the expect number of vehicles. Stored gasoline was not preserved with additives.

We also have a significant amount of cash at each village to be used in evacuation. Particularly after a major storm where there is extensive power outages and damage, fuel stations if open, stop taking credit cards and it becomes a cash-only business. This is also true of other stores.

I went to Pearlington to coordinate and help lay out the plan to secure. This entails taking down the common tent, removing all cots and mattresses into the sea container, and placing as much materiel as possible in the sea containers.

I went to the Gulfport operations office to get all the critical papers and electronics into a file cabinet. All paper files were placed in plastic bags, as was all electronic equipment we would not be taking with us. This took from early morning until noon for me to do by myself.

I finished around noon and headed to Pearlington to help take down and secure our village. The work site manager and I took down the walls of the big community tent, boxed up as many meal items, and paper goods and small appliances as we could.

By mid-afternoon we got the power tools in a trailer for evacuation and I had all the chairs and tables broken down and ready for the logistics crew to load into the sea containers. I went and filled all the propane tanks for the camper/trailers. On the way back the radio reported the governor of Mississippi has declared a state of emergency.

I drove back to Gulfport to check on activity there.

Friday AUGUST 29, 2008

By now the governor of Mississippi has declared mandatory evacuation of all people in FEMA housing and in newly constructed homes in the flood zone in Harrison and Hancock counties (basically all the land south of I-10). The governor of Louisiana declared evacuation of all people with disability or poor health. It is only a matter of time before a full evacuation order comes out and then the highways will be plugged with cars.

The National Hurricane Center is still predicting an impact of Gustav on the Gulf Coast with the “consensus” prediction pointing to landfall just west of New Orleans early Tuesday morning. The models are still ambiguous but there is a growing fear on a rapid intensification to a level 3 or higher storm as Gustav passes Cuba. The potential for a severe storm surge from New Orleans eastward is great.

Evacuation activity became bogged down due to insubordination and a good amount of confusion over who was in authority. Key staff members refused to back up the VCC. The logistics staff left for Louisiana to secure the three villages there, and the VCC and local staff focused on Orange Grove, headquarters and Pearlington. The Pearlington Village Manager was in Pennsylvania on a visit to home.

I left Gulfport about 7:15AM in order to meet our Village Coordinator in Pearlington by 8AM. Today we have to complete the job Pearlington Work site manager and I started yesterday – completely disassemble the Pearlington operation (tents) and secure all the equipment.

We boxed up all the paper records and load up several pallets of our bottled water to bring to the Hancock County EOC (Emergency operations center) in Bay St. Louis. We arranged for a local resident we have worked with to monitor the camp and to dispense remaining water if necessary after the storm.

It is likely if the storm is severe there will be significant water damage at the least.

About 9:00AM three of the logistics team came in from Gulfport. They had been securing our village in Lulling yesterday and driven all the way back to Gulfport again leaving the Louisiana work incomplete; rather than proceed to Houma. They arrived in Gulfport about 1AM.

We set them to work removing the cots and mattresses from the pods.

We find we have one large freezer full of food, and a second one about half full and a lot of canned goods in the kitchen. Our plan is to shut down the electricity in the village as a safety precaution. Since the food is going to go bad and we can’t possibly use it all even if we try to take it with us (Trinity Presbyterian Church in Meridian is already prepared to feed us.)

We decide to load up the freezer and carry it to the EOC, they were unbelievably thankful. It will help them if the situation gets really bad and we’ll get the freezers back. Although there was some debate about taking the food with us, the good thing is we’ve built a strong relationship with a very important recovery organization in Hancock County, and we’ve stayed true to Matthew 6:25-33.

Over objections a large truck was rented to fill with water bottles and extra materials in Pearlington we would not really need. This truck was driven to Meridian in the evacuation and neither it nor its contents were used.

Saturday August 30, 2008.

Gustav has slowed delaying the predicted landfall. At 6AM Saturday Gustav is a category 2, a dramatic increase last night and approaching Cuba. We will get a good idea of what is going to happen after the storm passes Cuba. Regardless, protocol says we should be departing as soon as possible.

The only glimmer of hope is that there are some shearing winds that may keep the storm from becoming a great storm. Increasingly, it looks bad for Louisiana right now.

The logistics staff has been driving round trip to LA and back in their effort to secure those villages. It appears much remains to be secured. Their lack of experience with a storm and the feedback from local residents they have with them is creating enough panic to prevent orderly movement.

Volunteer staff members from Louisiana village and Pearlington are instructed to come to Gulfport to help with Orange Grove take down. The order is countermanded wit no notice to the VCC by the Logistics personnel to proceed to Pearlington to help with a local resident’s preparation.

There is great confusion and blatant disregard for the VCC instructions. This is an outgrowth of no advanced dry runs of evacuation/securing drills and a confused chain of command.

Saturday, AUGUST 30, 2008

While the logistics staff has been running back and forth to Louisiana daily, I completely packed the staff office, securing computers or putting them inside plastic bags, putting all files and papers in plastic bags and securing all in metal storage cabinets. Then along with the VCC and some people she hired to help, I spent all day at Orange Grove cleaning up. WE managed to take down Orange Grove by late in the day. We decided to leave the community tent up since the track was still pointing west of here and it is too big for us to take down.

Gustav was growing ever stronger and was now a category 4 with a possibility of category 5.

Late in the day, Louisville finally gives us the go ahead to evacuate. All staff departs Orange Grove no later than this evening taking as many trailers as possible.

The problem is that all the logistics staff and village staff in Louisiana have yet to arrive in Orange Grove where protocol requires we stage departure.

When the Pearlington trailers were move d to Orange Grove last night, we found tires were underinflated and some tires were dangerously dry rotted. Furthermore, when we had all trailers in Gulfport we could not find any of the anti-sway stabilizer bars necessary for safe towing on the interstate. These were not found until months after we returned to Gulfport. As a result speed on the interstate is going to be limited to about 50 mph.

It looks really bad for the west part of the state and Louisiana. I-10 and I-59 are probably going to be bad.

The storm was originally expected by Saturday morning. Evacuation orders have already been given for the areas and we expect the interstate to soon be packed and all lanes running northward. The departure for Meridian is already over two days late according to our protocol. All staff are not at Gulfport yet.

Sunday, AUGUST 31, 2008

We got out of the village late yesterday (Saturday) and faced constant traffic on I-59N. Almost all cars had Louisiana plates and they drove as if they were in fear of their lives. At least people are taking this storm seriously.

We drove our people to Meridian in two convoys, the second leaving thirty minutes after the first. The second didn't leave for almost two more hours after us.

We notified Trinity Presbyterian Church of our departure and received good directions to the church. We stationed the camper trailers in the parking lot and set up a generator. We found numerous short-circuits in the campers, the generator would blow breakers. Power was problematic all night. . This was a result of the absence of routine maintenance. The second convoy ran into heavy traffic on I-59 and did not arrive until 4AM.

The National Hurricane Center is predicting a bad surge and Pearlington has a mandatory evacuation.

At the moment, there is a mandatory evacuation order by the governor for all people south of I-10 in Mississippi. I-59 is down to one lane due to an auto wreck. The governor has declared a 6PM to 6AM curfew for all of Hancock County and the National Guard is going house-to-house notifying people to evacuate. Tropical force winds are expected in Gulfport by midnight. We expect rain in Meridian later this afternoon. Both cloud cover and wind has picked up here.

I-55 and I-59 are now countercurrent flow (all four lanes moving north, no south traffic allowed.) I-10E was closed early this morning at the Alabama state line due to congestion around Mobile; they are moving people north on surface roads.

The Air Force is flying transports out of New Orleans. Buses drive to passenger pick up points, load people on, drive to the airport and up into the aircraft. The aircraft doors close and the plane takes off for Meridian, Jackson or another location. The planes return to New Orleans and repeat this shuttle.

The NHC reports that Gustav is accelerating. They have moved up the impact to tomorrow mid- to late morning. I just looked at the time-lapse satellite loop on the NHC web site, and its current speed is amazing. Although the intensity is fluctuating, they are still predicting a likely category 3 or category 4 storm at landfall and the expectation it may slow down on landfall creating torrential rain. Its speed may be a saving grace. It limits the time for intensification over the warm gulf waters

We are short of flashlights. Driving to downtown Meridian we see piles of sandbags stacked in many storefronts. We went to the Wal-Mart for flashlights and batteries, but the place is packed. The flashlight display is stripped. I hope we went far enough north. Later we find hundreds of batteries in the Logistics Sea Container in Gulfport, but no one had the key or knew its contents other than the logistics staff that were in Louisiana.

Monday, SEPTEMBER 1, 2008 Landfall

We evacuated Mississippi and Louisiana in the nick of time. We brought 7 of our staff from the Gulf and 12 immediate family from Houma.

Here in Meridian inside Trinity Presbyterian Church, on Monday morning at 9AM we get a cell phone call from Houma telling us the logistics staff person has lost their mobile home along with everything; their house, clothes, school supplies, utensils.

The high school about a mile away caught on fire (electrical?) and burned down. The local shrimp processing plant was obliterated and scattered everywhere. Like Pearlington before it, Houma at ground zero was dealt a smashing blow.

We met at 6PM for a telephone conference with our VCC leader who remained in the Gulfport area with emergency personnel. She is a qualified relief person.

We covered protocol and attempted to resolve the problem of countermanding orders. This problem continued until a Louisville staffer had to issue formal protocol that the VCC was in charge.

Tuesday, SEPTEMBER 2, 2008

The hurricane has passed Mississippi and the logistics and other staff people are pressing us to rush to get back to the villages before it is safe to do so. .

We have a critical problem, No one in PDA had thought to obtain for everyone emergency relief credentials and it is highly likely if we return to substantial community damage that we may be ordered to leave as protocol now requires these credentials for emergency relief to enter areas.

Furthermore severe tornadoes are still passing through Alabama and Mississippi as remnants of Gustav blow through. We get word Monday night to head back to Gulfport at 8AM Tuesday.

The three-hour trip to Gulfport was harrowing. We ran into a tornado warning around Laurel. The rain was extremely heavy and the sky was darkening very rapidly. We conferenced by cell phone and decided we were ahead of the worst of the weather. We agreed it was more expedient and safer to put more distance between us and Laurel rather than stopping. Wit no sway bars we were lucky no one was injured. We drove through an area outside Laurel, MS where a tornado was present. We finally got into Gulfport about 11:30AM. We worked until about 6PM to get our Village cleaned up.

Wednesday, SEPTEMBER 3, 2008

The next day, Wednesday, at Pearlington we find all the pods have floated out into the swamp behind the village. It appears all but two or three can be retrieved relatively undamaged. The kitchen took about eight or ten inches of water and smells foul. The plywood underlay of the floor is buckling.

At the end of the day, we drove back to Gulfport on the scenic beach route, US90, looking at the yachts and boats that washed up against the seawall beside the road. There is a lot of debris and visible damage but nothing like the situation after Katrina.

Friday, SEPTEMBER 5, 2008

In the space of the last eleven days we have struggled with three hurricanes. Fay gave us a glancing blow, Gustav severely damaged Houma and the Galveston area but we were spared us what should have been a deadly category 5 blow by the forward speed of Gustav after crossing Cuba and the westward track.

Now Ike lurks in the Caribbean moving towards the straight between Florida and Cuba, the mouth of the Gulf of Mexico. Everyone in our camps has been in constant motion, packing, evacuating, returning, cleaning and rebuilding and now facing a probable second evacuation for IKE next Wednesday or Thursday.

Saturday AUGUST 6, 2008

We went the eighty miles to Houma. We w ere worried about the curfew from 8PM to 6AM. We leave by 7:30AM. We find at Houma that the large storage tent has collapsed, all the pods are blown away and all the cots and mattresses are scattered about the property. The village will have to be rebuilt.

Sunday, SEPTEMBER 7, 2008

In Orange Grove Sunday at 11:30AM after church, we meet and discuss Ike. Ike is a serious storm, fluctuating between a category 4 and category 3 storm. It is wandering due west towards the Florida-Cuba are. The NHC predicts some time between now and Wednesday it is going to take a turn northward. If it enters the Gulf of Mexico it can get out only over land and we look like a good target. Ominously, as I remember it, Ike is on a path very close to Katrina in 2005 one of the worst hurricane on record.

Thursday, SEPTEMBER 11, 2008

Ike is now a category 2 hurricane about 200 or so nautical miles south of the mouth of the Mississippi river, moving west towards Corpus Christi or Galveston, TX. It is a massive category 1 storm with a low pressure at its center that says it should be a transitioning from category 3 to category 4. It is a very unusual and likely dangerous storm.

Ike's wind field is massive, especially on its northern arc, and that means us. We have tropical storm warnings all the way to the Alabama coast.

In Waveland, MS603 is already underwater. The police have it closed.
Then the weather radio reports that there are 20-25 foot seas in the gulf off the Mississippi coast. That's significant.

In Pearlington, I was on the telephone at 10AM looking for a forklift, concrete saw and trenching tool to start trenching for electrical work and reassembling the pods in our Pearlington Village with the village work site manager and an electrician. We had obtained a bid to rewire the village for about $1500.

Saturday, SEPTEMBER 20, 2008

It has been almost three weeks since we began preparing for Gustav. Neither Pearlington nor Houma is anywhere near ready for volunteers next week. We have volunteers coming into Orange Grove (Gulfport) and Olive Tree (New Orleans) Sunday. The next weekend we have volunteers coming into Pearlington and Lulling.

Recovering from the damage of those storms has been time-consuming, emotionally draining and physically exhausting. Most of our staff has worked 6-7 days a week, many of them 9 or 10-hour days for the majority of those three weeks.

In rebuilding Pearlington, we sustained little damage to tools and equipment since we packed out almost all our high-value tools from our two sea containers and filled them with our cots, mattresses, heaters and air conditioners and large dining tent; Gustav flooded the containers with about two feet of water, leaving behind a nice present of mold.

Although it never approached closer than about 200 miles, the surge from IKE undid everything we had done to recover from Gustav. All the pods were back into the swamp. We had to recover those in the same way.

Yesterday we managed to get all our surviving pods back into the rough formation we want thanks to the forklift provided by the graciousness of the Lagniappe Church in Bay Saint Louis. We’ve had to cut trenches in our concrete pad for new wiring. (That concrete pad is the parking lot of the former post office.) The water damaged much of our ground-level electrical wiring at Pearlington. We have dug trenches for electric line and new propane lines.

We discovered extremely dangerous electrical problems with the wiring done when the Pearlington Village was installed on the old US Post Office property after moving north one block due to construction. We found bare splices in wiring in conduits with evidence of gross arcing. We found numerous ground faults. Its was fortunate no volunteer or staff person was electrocuted.

We further find that when the village was moved to this property no conditional use permit was obtained and this caused problems for several months afterwards. The electrical contract has been voided by Logistics and a new contract set at about three times the price.

At this point we have neither electricity nor propane in Pearlington. Our pods and main tent at Houma Village were completely destroyed by Gustav and Ike. Because we were not able to pack out the cots and mattresses, or get them into the sea container on site a large proportion of them were destroyed, as was the big tent. Nothing is yet rebuilt therefore; it is not certain when the village will be able to support volunteers. The Lulling Village on the north side of New Orleans was spared a lot of damage. We lost a couple of pods.

Several of us spent a very hard full day last weekend at Lulling cutting up all the broken trees and limbs with chain saws and dragging the result to the curb. This weekend the Volunteer Village Coordinator and son and friends went back to finish cleanup and painting.

Everyone is exhausted and on edge. This is unbelievably hard work. Some of our staff are not prepared for this sacrifice and the lack of planning and rigor has made this recovery substantially more difficult that necessary.

As of May 2009, there is still no evacuation and recovery protocol ready. The new protocol was requested later winter. There are no persons working for PDA in the Gulf who have had experience with evacuations now.

At this time three tropical storms/hurricanes are present in the Gulf and south Atlantic. The tropical storm is almost on the Florida panhandle. Tropical storm ANA is moving fast, not intensify, and expected to hit the Texas/Louisiana/ Mississippi area about next Friday/Saturday. Bill is predicted to become a major category 4 storm in five days and is aimed at the southeastern Atlantic coast.

Day 482 - Step 2: More Lessons for PDA from the Past

From time to time I’ve promised you a plain reading of the condition of PDA, here is another chapter. The next blog entry will be a reflection on some of my experiences in seminary this summer.


One very big problem with PDA in the Gulf is its (lack of) organization. This reflects overall on its effectiveness in most arenas. From my experience this is related to the ego of one person who has been involved in the Katrina/Wilma response since the beginning. As I said earlier, the people who blaze the path usually are not the people to lead the army down the path.

Any one who has worked in a technical organization, or for that matter in an effective organization knows the value of documentation. It is as fundamental as breathing. PDA has no effective process documentation.

Here are some gross objective shortcomings of PDA, as late as May 2009:

1. There are no written documents or procedures on how to set up a village in response to a storm in the gulf or elsewhere.

2. There is no written document for evacuating the gulf that benefits form the experiences of evacuation during storms of 2008. In fact I know that revision of the process has been on the plate of the manager in the Gulf for some time yet when the opportunity to draw on the experience of people who went through an evacuation was there, he shirked it.

3. The is no written documentation on how to set up a village in response to a major disaster.

4. The issue of logistics is treated cavalierly. Rather than position or station materials and equipment in specified locations, the local management just auctioned off almost all the tools, equipment and materials purchased for Katrina that could be used in the future in other disasters.

5. There is an absence of continuity of staff. Continuity builds corporate intelligence that is the basis for doing a better job in the future. As best I can tell, beyond the previous financial manager and case manager liaison whose contracts were not renewed after two years, there has been no tenure longer than 1 year (+/-) by any staff member. Except for me, I do not think anyone was requested to write something one would call a “report.” This is probably the greatest failure of leadership.

The consequence of all this is wasted donations, precious money. It costs far more to re-learn the actions required in the future by repeating the mistakes of the past than to rely on an objective, dispassionate real-time assessment and procedure based on past actions.

Why is this happening? The people who could make it happen have no authority and the ones who have authority are impotent, blinded by their inexperience.

Day 475 - Step 1: View of PDA Looking Backwards

Fountain City and The Blister Sisters

I plan to air a number of observations about the operation of PDA in the Gulf with the idea I earlier described, to ask what should PDA look like as a disaster relief agency to build an improved schema? I also point out that it is very easy to see and criticize flaws after the fact. The existence of, and search for flaws only represents an opportunity to improve - not the shortcomings of any one person. What PDA accomplished, good and bad, reflects the tireless efforts of the early implementers who stepped into the fray when a helping hand was truly needed. I am after "continuous quality improvement."

The following blog entries will be a stream of conscience review of PDA in the Gulf, specifically for Katrina/2005 hurricane relief.

One of the more remarkable consequences of my working with volunteers coming to the Gulf to work with people with damaged homes was the result of a trip by a staff group not associated with PDA.

I knew next to nothing about PDA in 2006 but was well aware of the challenge to the people in the Gulf hit by Katrina. (Read the "Down In Mississippi stories at the bottom of the blog page). I heard via my Presbytery communications about several relief groups going down to the Gulf area in the year after Katrina. I would get a general printed release in our church bulletin describing three or four groups going down. I never heard a word via any in-person communication to our church about exact what PDA was or was doing, except the story by our pastor of his experience.

When I decided to go down to the Gulf to help I linked up with a group from a congregation in the Knoxville area. It tuns out that was the best thing I've ever done.

What was remarkable was the fact these folks had been going down to the Gulf every three months since a couple weeks after Katrina hit, yet they had never been involved directly with PDA. In fact, they tended to avoid the local PDA villages due to some negative interactions.

This group was quite successful in developing relationships with local people through the Pearlington Recovery Center who provided living arrangements and helped identify and schedule work. For three years this worked smoothly.

They are a highly skilled group and found a niche primarily doing drywall. The have invested in tools, other allied equipment and a trailer. They bring down groups of 10 to 20 each time. In all respects they represent an ideal image of Christians providing help for people in need.

I began traveling to the Gulf with them and made about six trips over 18 months. On one of the trips I recruited some members of my own church in Chattanooga. They had less than a positive experience for a number or regrettable reasons.

But rather than just throw up their hands, the women of the group returned to Chattanooga at the end of the trip and energized an informal group of women who were helping people in need around Chattanooga. The group comprised mostly of women (and a man or two) from our church called themselves, "The Blister Sisters."

What is the message PDA might learn from these two groups?

Day 473 - Construction

I think it is a time for retrospection.

In the next blog entry or two I intend to consider what PDA has done, what it is, and what a new (future) vision might be were we to move it beyond its stumbling, but effective beginnings. The vision begins with the premise that the purpose of PDA is:

1. To be consistent with the tradition of the reformed faith.

2. To be a vehicle to facilitate the action of the church at large to:
a.) operate from the perspective of the sermon on the mount.
b.) facilitate the members of the church at large to provide christian compassion and action by offering a hand up to those who have suffered disaster in person, place or spirit.

I think this vision will build on what PC(USA)/PDA has done. That is, it will be a framework built on recognition of its mistakes and failures; and on the incidental blessings pursuant to its actions.

I proffer the hypothesis its form and implementation will be quite different from its current one, but be a blessing to the church and a move closer to home for us all.


Stay tuned.

Day 471 - The Chief Cause of Blindness

I hold very few things with certitude. There is one. It is a fundamental fact of my existence in this world that I do know because it is my nature.

I know that every day I will face the dawn and meet my dear friends. I will say, “You can trust me.” I know with certitude that no matter how hard I try to defend the truthfulness of that claim, I am lying.

I will violate that trust in some way.

This failure sits at the heart of the necessity for forgiveness. Yet such breaking of trust is not a justification for not trusting but for seeking forgiveness. Forgiveness is not a release, or justification of untrustworthiness to repeat the same failures time on end ignoring the obligation to seek to improve. The obligation to improve requires that I have my eyes open and recognize my failures.

I will say, I am painfully aware of this failure. In respect for it, I hope to try my best to “stay out of the fields of circumstance” that leads away from the narrow gate and towards failure.

With this prolog, I want to tell you more news of our friends and cohorts of the Gulf PDA effort to aid the recovery from Katrina.

I thought about Black Thursday back in June, of the miserable affair involving Louisville and Gulf managers who participated in the firing of Leslie Fedo. I thought, perhaps I was too hard on these people, perhaps my expectations of behavior is too severe. After all, they are human and prone to the same errors I make. And then, something happened to make me realize they are still wandering in the same field of circumstance wherein they found themselves in June. Are they blind or just enjoying the walk?

Kevin Henry is a good friend and a long-time, loyal PDA staff person in Houma. Many of you know him and have enjoyed his delicious cooking, have helped him with, or watched him repair things at Houma or Fish Camp or Orange Grove. Some of you also know the great burden of chronic illnesses in his family that he carries quietly, and of his remarkable humility. If you have traveled and worked at the PDA camp at Houma, Kevin is one of the persons who connect you to the Blue Bayou.

Our manager in the Gulf fired Kevin last week. As I understand it, the manager is in the same field of circumstance that he walked into previously with his eyes open.

It seems Kevin contracted a severe case of poison ivy at work while cutting the grass at Houma and had to stay out a couple or three days. He continued to submit his per diem. The per diem, paid out of PDA funds is about $40/day. I am told by my friends there that this was used as the pretense to fire him.

Oh, they also were not happy that he was driving his truck home. It seems our banker-manager in Louisville has decided the tax implication is too messy to deal with, volunteer staff need to move, buy their own car, ride a bike or walk to work, I guess. So let’s toss that on the pile of rationalizations as well. I know that the manager who fired Kevin used a PDA trailer to move from Orange Grove to New Orleans, I guess that personal use of a vehicle was ok. Or, maybe he didn’t see the parallel.

This Gulf manager who is responsible for this termination is paid maybe $60,000 or more from our PDA funds. I have no idea of the salary of the banker/manager in Louisville who is accountable for the HR issues, but I’m willing to surmise she lives comfortably, or to many of us, luxuriously in a large five figure, maybe more, atmosphere.

Isn’t it ironic that the people who are paid the least usually have the greater positive impact on operations and those paid so well have the more negative impact?

Of course Kevin could have sought worker’s compensation, I imagine. In other PDA cases of on-the-job injury that I know, the work site manager at Pearlington for example, PDA covered all the medical bills rather than file worker’s compensation claims. So much for the good man, Kevin – or corporate memory.

But getting back to Black Thursday, after all, I do know these staffers who are involved in this matter; and have met or worked with them. I find it as hard to think they, or I, have questionable motivation or sincerity.

I do know that they have only been to the Gulf a few times, or have recently come to work there in the last year after all the experienced people had left. I also know from observation that they have little appreciation and knowledge of how the mission actually works on the ground, or even what the reality of need is there. After almost four years of work, there is almost no written process documentation to use to set up new villages or to know what negative things happened to avoid them in the future.

We could do a constructive self-comparison by using UMCOR as a metric to see how we stack up but would we want to know the answer?

The longer I think about the predicament of these managers the more I come to the realization that while mismanagement is an immediate problem; an underlying problem is at work. It lies at the heart of what the church is about. It is the problem of not effecting service by personal example. In one context it is called servant leadership. (This also is the heart of good management, by the way for those with a secular view.)

There is an old saying that power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely. Let’s replace that unpleasant word “corrupts” and use “blinds” to be more civil. In my intensive Hebrew class we often times take a respite for a few minutes and talk about matters of faith and belief. We opined briefly about the moral spectrum of David (the king) one day. (I guess by happenstance my comment also applies to the governor of South Carolina who called on the life of David as a justification for his behavior.)

David was anointed to a great task and responsibility. It was a task of service to the Nation of Israel, actually to God. As with all good things, he started with great promise and heroic deeds but soon the power of his office overcame his vision of service and the office of privilege became his perspective on the world as it sank shamefully into murder, adultery and excess.

Perhaps that story remains as a sentinel for us. For what other purpose has a leader but to serve faithfully those who he (or she) leads? When service, not privilege, is foremost in one’s mind, so is probably humility, compassion, peace and justice.

One could argue it isn’t power but is greed, or vanity, but the argument begs the question. All three lead down to a very hard field. Once one steps over the line into this field and begins to think of leadership in the church as a job of privilege, all good is lost. One becomes no better than a hireling, or at worst, than a despot. (As some of my minister-friends know, a hireling has a free pass, no responsibility for the ends suffered by the sheep placed in his or her charge.)

I’m sure none of these PDA managers believe they are doing things wrong, are hirelings, or are doing a disservice to other people who are in service with them. In fact, I imagine they think they really haven’t done anything particularly wrong at all in these matters. After all, these people that have been dismissed are simply employees - they don’t even have the status or tenure of “real” employees.

I am sure that in some other place these people of management may have done good, but now they have obviously wandered into a “field of circumstance,” where exit, if an exit exists at all, can only be painful.

I was reminded that the chief cause of blindness is what we have already seen (or done). It is a painful thing to realize how privilege inures one to compassion, peace and just action. Compassion, Peace and Justice, does that sound familiar?

So, my good friends at PDA, my readers, and me, when Compassion, Peace and Justice come to mind, please think about the difference between privilege and service; and act accordingly. We aren’t a corporation. We are, ab initio, a church sitting on a hill.

Peace and Grace,

Day 464 - Home

A quote from an unknown source:

You are not home.
There is a home.
Anything leading home is a blessing.

Day 463 - In The Light of Morning

The light of this morning reveals a narrow door standing open before me. As I step through it in about an hour and a half, my past becomes a remembered presence. Contemplating with a little unease the challenges before me, the realization dawns that the word “return” has an uncertain meaning.

Day 460 - Black Thursday Reprise

Black Thursday needs a reflection from old history.

So, the two-way message for the prudent one among us is to recognize what people who negotiate with you expect of you.

Remember, life among people is mostly a negotiated process so live and learn.

(note: for the full text of this post. contact me.)

Day 438 – Black Thursday

Normally a critic of the church would say the actions of its members reflects upon the church. However, For its members, especially in our church wherein its members select its leaders, the actions of our leaders reflect upon each of us. We are called to stand against culture, not strive to participate in its seduction by being a part of it. The spiritual cost to suborn bad behavior with silence, rather than call it into question, is too great.

Peace and Grace

(note: A full text of this post can be obtained by contacting me.)

Day 431 - Wandering here and there

I've been back in Chattanooga several weeks now, the shell shock of selling my home is past. The anticipation and challenges of Union Presbyterian Seminary, both financial and financial are growing larger.

The absence of all my friends down in Mississippi weighs heavy, but I know they are still there. It is frustrating that so much remains to be done, but it will get done.

About this blog; I plan to add entries to it from time to time as I have worthwhile things to add, so stay tuned.

I am starting a new blog with a slightly different focus, the name isn't clearly established, nor its full structure. Facebook leaves me a little wanting, it's a little too ad hoc which leaves something lacking but the interactive part is really important.

I have an idea about interactive conversations that I've played around with for several years in the technical domain. It actually began before Wikipedia and was almost the identical concept but my colleagues in my technical discipline couldn't envision such a thing taking off and I was prety busy with other matters...

As I say, stay tuned, my phone and e-mail work.


Henry
.

Day 425 -Lingering Reflections

We had a big spring rain this year and the Pearl River ran quite high. Here is one of the locals enjoying a stroll at the boat ramp. All you see here beyond the tern is reflection of the sky and telephone pole.



The rising water always threatens the village because a small swamp is just behind the shower trailer. The water made it up onto the concrete before subsiding.



Sorry the exposure is a little off; here is a remnant of Katrina about a block from the Pearl River. The stump has been here all this time.




Many of us heard there was a plan to bring in water to Pearlington since before Katrina. I imagine this fire hydrant is a good background for my good bye to Pearlington, 2009.



I've said it over and over, much damage remains to be repaired. In Gulfport near the Waffle House on US 90 I came across these flowers sprouting out of concrete pad where a building once stood.



Across the street, I find an oak that didn't survive.



Bye, Jessi.




What will I find on my return?

Peace

Day 423 - The Long Good Bye

My plan for my last day in Gulfport with PDA is to leave my keys, credit cards and client information in Gulfport with Leslie very early Saturday morning so I can get to Chattanooga before too late in the evening. It is a six hour forty minute drive, so with the one hour loss in time I need to leave by 9AM or so to get there by 3:30PM, early enough to plan for the evening. The drive is familiar enough by now that II know within ten minutes or so when I’ll get to my house.

Fortunately I started packing up the trailer on Tuesday, not Thursday. I am amazed at what I managed to drag down here to Gulfport over the last year. Quite early I realize there is almost more than a full truckload to bring back.

Since the only thing going on in Gulfport is taking down the village, most of my time has been spent in Pearlington this week, making every effort to get a few things settled with Mrs. Alice, Mr. Terry and Mary.

These are three cases have a special interest to me. I followed them, and made sure the critical things get completed. Mrs. Alice and her husband may face a mid-June eviction from their MEMA trailer, we have just completed redoing her porch, I managed to convince the Mennonites to do that, plus re-roof the house, bless them.

My good friends from Fountain City came down and almost completed the drywall; they have no idea how grateful I am for that. Crews in Pearlington, from Canada and California have been finishing the drywall, painting and laying flooring. I think Jessi will get the crews to complete that in time. A lot after the last week in May depends on the focus of the temporary work site manager – they are not going to replace me. Will he form the connections to the people?

I have managed to pull together enough donated funds to get the re-wiring started on Mary’s home. Now we depend on the Arkansas Presbytery to finish that home by next fall.

Mr. Terry is a problem, he has very serious structural problems, problems too big for me to tackle, I know more or less how to fix it but the risk is pretty great. Jacking a house up that already is on 13 foot piers and replacing girders is a big job. Terry is obsessed with moving in ahead before fixing them. He feels the pressure from MEMA.

It is one of my more painful decisions, do I go ahead and get the interior items with the donated funds before the structural problem is corrected ?– knowing I’m leaving in a few days and probably no one there will be as forceful with him as I am. I fear for him when the next big blow comes from the Gulf.

My good office mates want to have a ”going away” get-together, but I have been sleeping in Pearlington, working on these homes and have not yet to really taken the time to just suit back and enjoy Jimmy Lamey’s company. Time runs through my hands like grains of sand.

I call Jimmy on Tuesday.

“Jimmy, you said if I wanted to have a party at your place to just say the word. Is that offer still on for this weekend?”

“Henry, sure it is, but this is Mother’s Day weekend, you know. I have plans for Sunday.”

“That should work ok, Jimmy, I was kind of hoping we could have a little get together with my friends and yours Friday evening. I was thinking that I could pick up some shrimp over in Waveland and we could have a shrimp boil and just enjoy some time together.”

“How many do you think would come?”

“Well, I‘d call Larry, and guess there might be maybe eight or nine plus you and your family. I’ll pick up the shrimp and beverages.”


“Henry, there isn’t any need to do that, I drive by the shrimp stand coming home from work every day, I’ll pick it up. Robin can pick up the other stuff.”

“I do not want you spending your money on it, you keep the receipts and I’m paying you for it. How much shrimp do you think we need, ten pounds or so?”

“Yeah, that ought to be about right. Like I said, I’ll ask Robin to pick up the rest of the stuff and get it going when I get home from work.”

“What time?”

“About 3:3PM or 4:0PM.”

“OK, I’ll get my stuff done and get over about them to help.”

Then I start thinking about how I‘m going to do all this. Mr. Terry has enough donated funds to get his kitchen cabinets and bath sinks. I had planned to buy all this stuff with him on Wednesday but he went to the doctor and is feeling pretty bad.

“Henry, I am so sore I can’t leave the house. Can we meet at Lowe’s Thursday and pick up the cabinets? “

“Terry, let’s do I early, OK?”

“Sure.”

“I’ll call you when leave Gulfport Thursday morning, that gives you time to drive over to Waveland to meet me.”

We meet a Lowe’s and sort through all he needs. We find everything until we get to the double sink for the bath vanity and find out they are out of stock and there is no plan to reorder. Crud.

I ask the floor clerk, “Do you think one of the other stores might have one in stock?”

He gets on the computer and finds out there is one left in Gulfport.

If I drive back early Friday, I can pick it up and then deliver it to his house Friday afternoon. I have to be in Gulfport Friday noon anyway. My office buddies have planned a lunch for me. They are already a little hurt I planned my own going away party Friday evening, even though I invited them all.

Time is getting really tight. In the midst of all this I finally reach Larry who is working on some property near Hattiesburg and invite him.

I also have to make another run to Lowe’s to pick up gutters and some other materials for Mrs. Alice. It looks like I’ll be spending Thursday evening in Pearlington. How am going to get back to Gulfport, go to the luncheon, drop by Lowe’s and pick up the sink, get ready for the party and also pack and leave on schedule Saturday morning? I’m going to take care of Mrs. Alice, Mary and Terry; everything else is going to wait.

Driving back from Gulfport Thursday evening, I realize the moon is almost full. It I eerie, I’m driving down MS604 with the almost full moon shining the way. I immediately think about driving in from Picayune in November, 2006 on my first trip when the moon was near the same phase. Friday night, it will be the day before the full moon,

I check the calendar. Just like my first arrival in November 2006, my trip to Pearlington for the going away will be the day before the full moon. I’m inclined to fall back on my college days and say “Far out!”

On Friday I do nothing but work all day, trying my best to get every last detail tied up so can get to Jimmy’s on time. We had a great luncheon in Gulfport at noon. Afterwards I pick up the sink and drop by the package store to pick up some beverages.

I hurry to get back to Pearlington, but I’m late. I get to Jimmy’s about 5:15PM. Jimmy has these humongous shrimp, 10-12 count per pound. They are absolutely beautiful. Plus Robin has picked out garlic, potatoes, brussel sprouts, corn and all the rest. I’m a little worried no one will show. No one is there yet but Jimmy and Robin and their two daughters. I call Jessi to see what is going on. She tells me they will be there about 7.

About 6:45 Jimmy, his daughter Julia and I are talking about the bayou.

“We ought to go to on bayou down towards the Gulf. I can’t keep Dr. Bob from Fountain City satisfied. He wants to go out every time watching the birds.”

“You know Jimmy, I’ve never been out on the bayou with you in all this time.”

So Jimmy, Julia and I get into Jimmy’s nice aluminum bateau and head down the bayou.

Jimmy’s place is at the head of an arm of the bayou. As we motor down we have to run through some shallows, some thick grass and dodge a few snags before we get out into the bayou proper. I took my camera, I’ll post some pictures.

The sun hasn’t set yet but it is so low I the sky it bothers the eyes. We pass several houses; Jimmy tells me their history from Karina. We are passing trough all the marshes, I see a little side trail that runs up to a partly rebuilt dock, but mostly it is miles of swamp grass, birds, and the wind blowing in my face, sitting there shoulder to shoulder with Julia. I just miss seeing a couple of alligators. I turn to look in the direction of Julia’s pointing just as a fairly big one makes a quick roll and dives under the surface at the sound and presence of our boat.

We go down past the new bridge on US90 in White’s Bayou and go on to within about a quarter mile of the mouth of the Pearl River. Jimmy says we ought to come back late with a floodlight and look for gators. It is getting late and we figure by the time we get back to the house it will be past time to put the shrimp on. The almost full moon is rising off to the east giving us plenty of light.

Sure enough by the time we pull up to the dock, I see Frank and Mark standing by the cooler, and Jessi and Neal sitting at the table talking to Robin. Larry has shown up and even Jimmy’s friend Tommy Joe and his wife.

We get the shrimp going and soon there is pile of it poured out on the table and we are all eating to our hearts’ content. I sit there nursing a beverage listening to the conversation and watching people. The though strikes me, we need Lizzie, where is the karaoke?

About nine o’clock the talk turns to the bayou again.

“Do you want to go back and look for alligators?”

“Sure!” I say.

So Jessi, Mark, Jimmy and I climb back in the boat. The water I about a foot lower, the tide is running out. With a good bit more effort we negotiate the shallows and get out on the bayou. Jessi has the spotlight and she is finding a lot of frogs but no gators.

“The white spot are frogs. Look for little bright red spots, that is the gators. The light blinds them and they freeze.”

We go down just about as far as before but don’t see anything big. Jessi finally tires holding the spotlight and hands it to me as we turn back. I scan well out from of the boat along the marsh edge and we start to pick up the little red eyes. When we pass a little inlet off the main bayou I shine the light up the edge ohe marsh and the eyes look like a Christmas tree in the water. We motor up and find many small gators, fledglings, maybe 6-12 inches long. There is a big gator around her somewhere but all we see are the fry. We almost run over a three foot one, probably cruising for a dinner of his cousins.

We finally turn back towards home. The almost full moon lights our way as we cover the last few hundred yards, only this time it isn’t MD604.

A thought passes my mind, I think about the new fire hydrants on 604. Who would have thought we ever see it. As we near the dock I hear conversation and see people on the deck sitting around the fireplace. The party has started in full. Someone is showing one of our PDA staff the watermark on Jimmy’s barn. They didn’t realize this place was under about ten feet or more of water, or that the folks from Fountain City rebuilt the house (without a liability release), or that I spent a Memorial Day in the sweltering, buggy heat with them re-roofing Jimmy’s house. As I said, Jimmy and Robin are family.

So much has happened in a year, I’ve learned an awful lot about many things and suffered some real disappointment with the decisions and choices of the person in PDA who made it possible. I’m grateful but saddened by his pride.

Even so, my ties here are strong. There are good people here who have unwittingly opened the eyes of hundreds of Presbyterians. They have made us a greater people than we were.

It still sure seems like home to me.

Thinking about the moonrise, earlier in the evening, I wonder, when will I get back again?

Peace and Grace

Day 422 -Dry Bones

Work in Mississippi is still calling out to me. I’ve gotten a couple calls about questions, and methods, money, etc. I won't tell that they came also during the furlough. What I’m sensing is that work is still getting done due to your willing hearts and helping hands.

When I was moving all my belongings out of my home the week before it closed (a brutal week), I came across several documents I’d saved, things such as the budgetary plan for the PC(USA) mission effort in Mississippi (they have abandoned that plan) and it caused me to think more about what is going on inside the church organization. I said I wouldn't go on about this thing, but what is not happening there is an old story that will not go away without some help.

One of the things about moving out of my home that stimulated this line of thinking was my skinnying down my possessions, giving (well, long term loans) my woodworking tools away, tools I’ve worked several decades to collect and use. I threw away 30 year old notebooks of technical ideas I had wanted to pursue when I had the time in the future.

It was a strange time. But, what do I really need in a small one bedroom apartment when the only time I will have is going to be to read or write coursework?

The absence, or longing for what I gave up really didn’t sink in while I was doing it, it really hasn’t fully yet, but I’m living out of my truck, more or less, and this really reminds me of stories of experiences heard in Pearlington after Katrina when all of most people’s possessions were lost essentially instantly. No one had a home.

Not helping them last week, never helping them again in Gulfport and Pascagoula made me think about Ezekiel, about how the people of Jacob lost everything by simply turning from the covenant.

I think about the wind blowing around 100 Witherspoon St. in Louisville last week during their self-imposed furlough, even imposed on mission workers. The time when the leader ordered everyone to cease helping the poor and needy, to turn off the cell phones out of fear of some legal action by a disgruntled employee, I suppose.

That wind might have sounded like wind rustling dry bones. Can you imagine the sound?

I wonder if the leaders in Louisville are dry bones, spiritually dead. Would Langston Hughes' poem give succor?

Peace

We passed their graves:

The dead men there,

Winners or losers,

Did not care.


In the dark

They could not see

Who had gained

The victory.

It made me think of the retired man whose home we remade. He consistently sent a title of his social security to us as his gift of thanksgiving for our help.

The world is full of hope for you who live and burn with righteous zeal.

Day 407 – Days of Rest

I'm on vacation, ha! Not only vacation but a fast running week headed towards a walk through by the buyers of my home Sunday afternoon.

The impact of this move started getting to me as I began cleaning out my woodworking studio. I looked at that pile of cherry and walnut with a few boards of maple and quite a few quarter sawn oak boards. There are the boards I had sawn and planed for a bathroom table-sink sitting on my work bench, a gift, an unrequited one at that. I started thinking about when, if ever, I'd get back to woodworking again. The import and implication of this choice is really unsettling now.

Last night I learned a few Hebrew letters, aelph, beh, gimmel, dalet, hey. I ran through several pages printing the letters out. It's really hard to go from alphabet to words. It's fascinating though. No articles, all capital letters. Words are not written like they are supposed to be with the funny symbolic annotatios because Hebrew readers know the meaning in context.

Then I received an e-mail from Pearlington about one of our dear clients and a call about one of the work site staff who has an "inexplicable" charge on his credit card. It turned out we had bought two handicapped shower stall inserts for a couple of clients in Gulfport and he'd lost his receipts.

One of the clients is blind. I was at his house when we removed his tub. Someone had installed a "jacuzzi tub" but hadn't leveled it properly or connected the electrical hook up to the pump properly.

I knocked at the door. No answer. After a while I got a call from the work site manager - he said go on in, the client had just gotten back from dialysis and was resting, he knows we are coming.

I hesitantly opened the door and heard his voice, "Is that the PDA people? If you are come on in."

"Yes that's who we are," I replied as i opened the door and edged in. He was lying on the bed, obviously very tired.

"You'll have to forgive me for not getting up. That dialysis really takes it out of me. I've got to rest a while, you all just go on in."

"Ok Mr. Jefferson, I'll just take a look at the bathroom."

"Just don't move anything in the bdroom, ok?"

It was awkward trying to work and not disturb Mr. Jefferson. As we pulled out the shower, we found a lot of water had leaked behind the tub since the contractor hadn't leveled the tub so it wouldn't rock; and he had just run a line of caulk along the bath-wall line. The first time someone stepped in the tub that seal broke. The result? A lot of mold in the wall behind the tub.

We had to tape a plastic sheet over the the bathroom door so all the mold we scraped didn't get into the bedroom. It was hard because we had to pass through the bedroom to get out of the house. We managed it, then treated the wall with bleach.

The next day we came back. After knocking, Mr. Jefffeson hailed us in. He was on his hands and knees feeling round underneath the bed for his shoes.

He reached under the bed and pulled out a leather dress shoe, "This isn't it. "

"Can I help?" I asked.

"No, I'm trying to find my other white tennis shoe. It is supposed to be here under the bed." He leaned over and reached further under the bed.

About that time a horn honked out in the driveway.

"Oh that's my taxi. He's supposed to take me to work. I'vegot to find that other shoe."

At a knock at the door, Mr. Jefferson says,"Come on in, Ralph."

Ralph, the taxi driver asked, "Are you ready?"

"No, not yet. Just a minute until I find that shoe."

I start looking under the bed. I can see a couple of atheletic shoes but none of them match the one in Mr. Jefferson's hand. It isn't there. I look in the closet behind him. Mr Jefferson sits in the floor feeling a couple more shoes, shaking his head negatively.

"I know that shoe is here, someone must have moved it.

"Mr. Jeffeson, I don't see the match in the closet or under the bed."

"Well, I'll just use another pair. Do you see the match for this one?" he asks as he holds up another shoe.

"Yes, I see it behind you in the door to the closet."

He leans over and rubs his hand on the carpet until he touches it."

"Great! I'll be there in a minute Ralph."

"Take your time," Ralph replies.

In a few minutes Mr. Jefferson walks out of the bedroom unaided to the taxi and heads to work.

We finish our work, priming the wood with a strong primer and carefully take all our stuffed trash bags out to the driveway. Now all we have to do is wait on that special order shower insert to show up.

I wonder, are we doing any better job finding our way with our work in Mississippi than Mr. Jefferson is with his? We see but do not perceive.

Day 406 – Compassion and Change

I’ve been in Pearlington much of all the week before last and again last week. Driving back and forth to Gulfport isn’t much fun, it is pretty much a ghost town.

There are only four people left around Orange Grove. Two of them are dismantling the village, one doing the last odd jobs on clients’ homes and the last our village manager who is trying to get through his exams at the local college.

Pearlington, though, faces a lot of challenges. The work site managers haven’t done a very good job summarizing the cases so one has to get them to visit and then prepare work summaries. The upside of this is a much closer, compassionate relationship with the clients because the activity becomes more of an informal, family-level interaction.

I worry that after I’m gone (not that I am so important but I sense a difference in philosophy), the next work managers will just push through and that family-relationship that sustains compassion may be lost.

The three cases that really worry me are Mrs. Alice, Terry and the woman in Waveland that a group in the Arkansas Presbytery is helping. More on the latter two later.

Thanks to the Mennonites initially, and to several volunteer groups, we have made great progress on Mrs. Alice’s house. We have gotten the roof repaired, the porches repaired and installed all the drywall (Thanks to the Fountain City PC crew for the drywall installation), finished and primed it.

The groups from Canada and California really helped this week. They managed to get the interior mostly painted and they crew is installing the subfloor over the existing one. The original floor is pretty well warped and delaminated in places from water damage.

The contractor who set the house backup didn’t do a very good job leveling the home and some floors are pretty out of kilter. Because of time, we had planned to put in a new subfloor but leave as-is the areas of the floor that are out plane.

We had a skilled crew and as usual, small miracles happen when good people start a job.

As they looked at it, they determined to shim in these unlevel places using ripped 2x4’s. I’m always nervous when a crew starts some thing so significant because I worry they will not get done in a week and I’ll be left with a relatively unskilled crew the next week to finish some skilled work.

This crew worked like madmen and manager to get all the unlevel places fixed and covered with subfloor. They only could tack down the subfloor, the next group will need to carefully nail down all the edges and go down the stud/shims in the floor. Then the flooring can start.

My worry about the team that did the leveling was unjustified. Knowing we have set a mid-June objective to be done if at all possible, they said they wanted to come back from California in a couple weeks and finish.

The REAL worry is the comment by the fellow setting up the move of Pearlington to Diamondhead, “I hope they don’t try to come back in May, we need to set up Diamondhead and they will not have any place to stay.”

The sad conflict between compassion and organizational woodenness persists, hopefully compasssion will prevail.

I am going to send a note to them about where they may stay with a local family in town to get this done.The sad conflict between compassion and organizational woodenness persists, hopefully compasssion will prevail.

We should always seek to sustain compassion. I'm slowly figuring out this is the key to what PDA's mission should be for the long haul and good of the church.